Episode 150: Communication in Marriage

Episode 150: Communication in Marriage

 

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Your marriage is the most important relationship you have on this earth and with communication being such a huge part of what makes relationships work, well, we needed to discuss this. It’s easy as a working mom to not make time to connect with our husbands most likely from being too busy and having his presence taken for granted. In this episode, you’ll learn 3 ways on how you can become a better communicator with your spouse.

About Our Guest

Mary Whitman Ortiz, author of “Why Can’t I Talk to Him/Her about Sex?” loves to inspire her audiences to create a true connection in their marriage. She is a certified life coach and trained facilitator with Prepare-Enrich, Adventures in Marriage, and Marriage Mentors. She’s worked with women recovering from sexual intimacy issues such as human trafficking, sexual abuse, abortion, spousal pornography usage, and distorted cultural messages. For over 20 years she’s facilitated self-awareness and relationship development for corporate, church, and community groups. Mary draws from her B.S. and M.A. in Gifted Education to create interactive and presentations with impact. She founded Limitless Intimacy, a movement to support a healthy and Godly view of love, sex, and intimacy.

Action items from the show

Use this Communication Tool as follows:
1. Agree upon a mutually convenient time and location to share.
2. Pick a setting free from distractions.
3. Express ideas in a neutral tone (ex. not while irritated or angry).
4. Let one person do all the speaking, while the other listens only.
5. Switch roles and let the other person do all the speaking.
6. Answer questions or follow-up on issues AFTER completed.
7. Use DTR to gain understanding and build connection.

  • Appreciations

“I like how you are helping me more with the dishes.”

  • New Information

“I have a meeting this week with a new client.”

  • Puzzles

“I’m puzzled why the toothpaste cap is rarely on the tube.”

  • Concerns with request for change

“I’ve noticed that you interrupt me when I’m talking and I’d rather you wait until I’m done.”

  • Apologies

“I’m sorry that I pressured you about buying another house.”

  • Wishes, Hopes and Dreams

“I have always wanted to go to Europe and visit a real castle.”

  • Prayer

“Would you pray with me about this issue I have going on at work?”

Tips shared on the show

How to Improve communication in your marriage

1. Know what you want to talk about.

  • Separate the issues from the hurt and confusion

  • Focus on your role in the situation

  • Release offenses, disappointment, grief

(Be responsible for you. Step into your God-given confidence. Reframe your identity by His word.)

2. Create the best setting possible.

  • Find (ask for) a time that is mutually agreed upon

  • Choose the least amount of distractions

  • Enter the conversation with peaceful outlook

(When God is your ultimate source, the goal of every interaction is to increase understanding.)

3. Practice a daily/weekly check-in.

  • Understand different levels of communication (facts, opinions, needs, dreams)

  • Access vulnerability for deepest connection

  • Share praise, requests for change, apologies, prayer

(You are either growing closeness or distance with every step you take.)

Learn More About Our Guest

Website
http://www.marywhitmanortiz.com
Social Media Links
https://www.facebook.com/MaryWhitmanOrtiz/
https://www.instagram.com/marywhitmanortiz/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/mary-whitman-ortiz-ma-clc-b8943034/
https://www.facebook.com/groups/sexandintimacyforthechristianwoman/
Couples’ Communication Kit: bit.ly/2KwnKMa

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Episode 104: {Marriage} Protecting Your Marriage Part 2 with Kimberly Walton

Episode 104: {Marriage} Protecting Your Marriage Part 2 with Kimberly Walton

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This week we are finishing up our conversation with Kimberly Walton from CherishedWives.com. The husband and wife relationship is the most important relationship you have on earth.  It’s valuable and needs to be protected. Join us as Kimberly shows us how to protect it like a castle.  Last week we talked about the outer defenses and this week she walks us through how to fortify those inner defenses.

about out guest

Kimberly has been my go-to marriage expert because she is wise, relatable, and has a way of teaching concepts that make sense and make a difference in marriages.  I have seen it first hand in my own relationship with my husband.  Kimberly is a contributor to Life Balance Membership and our free community on Facebook.

For our Life Balance members, she has put together a great worksheet to help you plan your marriage defenses.  It’s located inside the resource section of the membership under marriage.  Learn more about starting your membership by going to LifeBalanceMembership.com

learn more about our guest

FACEBOOK

CHERISHEDWIVES.COM

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 Prep Dish is a healthy subscription-based meal planning service. When you sign up, you’ll receive an email every week with a grocery list and instructions for prepping your meals ahead of time. After only 1-3 hours of prepping on the weekend, you’ll have all of your meals ready for the entire week. You’ll save time and have amazingly delicious meals like Smoky Paprika Chicken Legs with a Trio of Roasted Vegetables or Turkey & Zucchini Lasagna. And, the founder, Allison is offering listeners a free 2-week trial to try it out. You can’t beat that. Check out  PrepDish.com/ylr  for this amazing deal!

Prep Dish is a healthy subscription-based meal planning service. When you sign up, you’ll receive an email every week with a grocery list and instructions for prepping your meals ahead of time. After only 1-3 hours of prepping on the weekend, you’ll have all of your meals ready for the entire week. You’ll save time and have amazingly delicious meals like Smoky Paprika Chicken Legs with a Trio of Roasted Vegetables or Turkey & Zucchini Lasagna. And, the founder, Allison is offering listeners a free 2-week trial to try it out. You can’t beat that. Check out PrepDish.com/ylr for this amazing deal!

Exciting NEWS! WE HAVE LAUNCHED OUR VERY OWN OFFICIAL APP. Free to Download!

Episode 102:  {Marriage} Protecting Your Marriage with Kimberly Walton (Part One)

Episode 102: {Marriage} Protecting Your Marriage with Kimberly Walton (Part One)

SUBSCRIBE TO the show BY CLICKING IN ANY OF OUR BUTTONS BELOW!

The husband and wife relationship is the most important relationship you have on earth.  It’s valuable and needs to be protected.  In this episode, our guest Kimberly Walton from CherishedWives.com walks us through an illustration of how to protect your marriage like a castle.  

About our guest

Kimberly has been my go to marriage expert because she is wise, relatable, and has a way of teaching concepts that make sense and make a difference in marriages.  I have seen it first hand in my own relationship with my husband.  Kimberly is a contributor to Life Balance Membership and our free community on Facebook.

For our Life Balance members, she has put together a great worksheet to help you plan your marriage defenses.  It’s located inside the resource section of the membership under marriage.  Learn more about starting your membership by going to LifeBalanceMembership.com

Learn more about our guest

Facebook

Cherishedwives.com

A gift for you from our sponsor! 

Enjoy 14 days for free to check out Prep Dish!

One of the keys to finding balance in your life is through systems.  I really think that one of the most powerful systems you can implement is your weekend prep routine.  The one piece to prep that has always stressed me out was food prep.  It takes so much time to put a healthy menu together, get the ingredients organized, and figure out what to prep ahead of time.  That’s why I am so glad I found Prep Dish.  

 

Prep Dish is a healthy subscription-based meal planning service. When you sign up,
you’ll receive an email every week with a grocery list and instructions for prepping your meals ahead of time. After only 1-3 hours of prepping on the weekend, you’ll have all of your meals ready for the entire week. You’ll save time and have amazingly delicious meals like Smoky Paprika Chicken Legs with a Trio of Roasted Vegetables or Turkey & Zucchini Lasagna. And, the founder, Allison is offering listeners a free 2-week trial to try it out. You can’t beat that. Check out PrepDish.com/ylr for this amazing deal!

Exciting NEWS! WE HAVE LAUNCHED OUR VERY OWN OFFICIAL APP. Free to Download!

Episode 64: Marriage Focus: 5 Assumptions That Couples SHOULD be Making

Episode 64: Marriage Focus: 5 Assumptions That Couples SHOULD be Making

 

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About our guest

In this episode, we are joined by our Lifestyle Expert for Marriage, Kimberly Walton. Kimberly Walton, is a marriage mentor, blogger, and speaker who helps Christian women create wildly successful marriages through retreats, workshops, and one-on-one sessions. As founder of Cherished Woman International, Kimberly teaches women to strengthen their marriage through what she calls the INLOVE Approach: Invest, Nurture, Learn, Offer, Value, and Embrace. She believes that marital success comes from creating an environment where couples can be emotionally vulnerable and honest, while also being mindful of self-care and the uniqueness that each brings to the relationship. Her approach is solution focused and embraces humor, tenderness, transparency, and Christian values.

Tips and action items shared on the show

Kimberly walks us through the 5 Assumptions That Couples SHOULD be Making Related to Marital Problems

1. Assume that All couples Have Problems

2. Assume that Solving Problems Fast may NOT equal the Best Solution

3. Assume that Taking a Partnership or Joint approach to solving the problem is better than the Solo approach

4. Assume that There WILL be differences BUT plan ahead for challenges.

5. Assume that couples in strong relationships do not make a habit of making mountains out of mole hills.

Learn more about our guest

Website: http://www.cherishedwoman.com/

Facebook: Be A Cherished Woman

Kimberly is also in our Facebook Community, you can get instant access HERE

Exciting NEWS! WE HAVE LAUNCHED OUR VERY OWN OFFICIAL APP. Free to Download!

Episode 60:  Set For Success; Understanding Your Husband

Episode 60: Set For Success; Understanding Your Husband

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In this episode, we hear from our Marriage Lifestyle Expert, Kimberly Walton.  I am so excited to have Kimberly join the Your Life Rocks team.  Haven’t met Kimberly yet?  Let me tell you about her.

About our guest

Kimberly Walton, is a marriage mentor, blogger, and speaker who helps Christian women create wildly successful marriages through retreats, workshops and one-on-one sessions. As founder of Cherished Woman International, Kimberly teaches women to strengthen their marriage through what she calls the IN LOVE Approach: Invest, Nurture, Learn, Offer, Value, and Embrace. She believes that marital success comes from creating an environment where couples can be emotionally vulnerable and honest, while also being mindful of self-care and the uniqueness that each brings to the relationship. Her approach is solution focused and embraces humor, tenderness, transparency, and Christian values. Her training spans a wide range of formal and personal education, professional and personal experience, and cultural studies, while she teaches very practical how to’s. Kimberly lives the life of a cherished woman, married to the love of her life and living in beautiful California. 

Tips shared on the show

Listen in as she shares about getting to know your spouse and our differences in how we approach life, communicate and respond to things that can create strife and tension in marriages. Once we understand the perspectives as just differences we can work with the realms of the differences to create greater intimacy and harmony. 

Action items from the show

As you are looking at these differences, here are three things to consider.  

Global Verses Linear Approach To Life-  Knowing whether or not your partner needs to know the big picture or if they are linear, they need to know steps one at a time.  Once you have figured out who you and your husband is, it will help provide clarity to your communication.  When you can respect and respond accordingly, not only will things go more smooth but you will both feel so much better about it.

Response Modes- Do you and your spouse respond with your mental, physical or emotions?  Do you think, act, or feel first?  It’s helpful to know this about your spouse.  One you know what to expect, but also you can help them move through the different responses so they don’t get stuck.

Modes of Perception-Is your spouse more sensitive to sight, sound, or kinesthetic?  Why is this even important?  Think about how you can better respect, communicate and even show love.  

Knowing your spouse in all these areas will help us honor our husband’s daily but also with difficult conversations, or in times of stress.

Learn more about our guest

Kimberly: http://www.cherishedwoman.com/

Exciting NEWS! WE HAVE LAUNCHED OUR VERY OWN OFFICIAL APP. Free to Download!